Facing the fear

In life there are rule followers and rule breakers. I’ve always been a rule follower. I was a good kid that hardly broke the rules and if I did happen to break the rules, I felt terrible. I punished myself! It’s always good to follow the rules but I also think it’s put me on a path to only want to follow rules and think about the consequences. It’s stopped me from being a risk taker.

I’ve lost all this weight which has really forced me to get to know the “new” me. I do feel like I can do anything because I’ve overcome this huge battle with “fat” but I am still cautious. Losing the weight wasn’t a risk, it was something I wanted to do. Like the many times I tried before, if I didn’t succeed I would just keep on traveling the same path. But this time I stuck with it and made it happen. Now I’m willing to try more things because I wasn’t really living life before, I was just surviving.

I’ve become a runner. I love to run. I love the athleticism, endurance and just the fun behind it all. What I love about running is I can push myself each and every time I run to accomplish more or I can just go for an easy thing. It’s what I love! A few weeks back I decided to I wanted to try trail running. I wanted to do a night time trail race but I had never even run on a trail before.

I talked about it and committed and the next day I would chicken out. Tree roots, rodents, dangers out in nature all detoured me. I was afraid. I was afraid of falling, hurting my self and getting bit by a snake. I have a thing about snakes. Maybe night time trails weren’t for me, so I signed up for a day time race. I still contemplated not going to the race because of all of my fears. I didn’t even want to tell anyone I was going to do it just in case I chickened out and didn’t go. I didn’t want to fail or not do it and have everyone know. This kind of was a BIG deal for me.

Accountability is a good thing and this is a good reason why it’s important to have an accountability partner in life. By not saying anything to anyone no one knew and no one would have called me on it. I didn’t speak about it until two days before and when I said it out loud, I knew I was committing to it.

I was nervous before the race but I played it off very well. I wasn’t worried about time because I knew I was going to do this slow. Plus, a friend told me it would take me a long time to run the trail compared to my road time. I was expecting to be there for a while. But I felt weird because I had on new trail shoes and everyone else’s shoes were so dirty. I had only worn mine to work to break them in. I felt out of place.

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By the end of the race my shoes were definitely broken in and plenty dirty. Trail running virgin no more! I didn’t even realize I was sweating so much until Willie told me I had soaked my compression socks. That’s never happened before. I could literally wring out my clothes due to the sweat. I’ve NEVER sweat so much before in my life, not even when I was pushing 350 lbs.

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The race was the hardest thing I’ve done to date. I was afraid to do it and was worried about falling and breaking an ankle. This was new territory for me. I am a road runner! The first 2 miles I hated it. I almost turned off on the 5K split but I knew I would regret it if I didn’t do the entire 15K. I kept pushing and met some people along the way. At mile 3.50 I met Maddy who has been training for this race. We chatted and she encouraged me. That is what I needed because I kept going and it became fun. In the moments when I wanted to give up, she was right there with me. I told her she was my angel that day. Around mile 6, we picked up Jason. He needed his own encouragement at that point and this time I was the person pushing him. We chatted and ran and pushed to the end. We all finished together and it was great. It wasn’t about the time for us, it was just about making it to the end. This is one experience I will never forget!

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Like I said before, time wasn’t important but I did the 15K (9.38 miles) in 2:04:05. Yes I was taking it very slow but it was just a big deal for me the finish. There were no medals at this race but there was a pint glass at the end. A very nice glass that I will cherish just as much as those running medals. Yesterday I overcame a huge fear and kicked it in the nose! And of course, there was chocolate milk when I was done!

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The moral of the story is:  don’t let fear guide you through life.  You only get to live once so why not make the most of it and live with no regrets.  So what’s a fear that you would like to get over?

I run because…

I run because…

Today is National Running Day!  What a great day to celebrate running and why people choose to run. I’ve never really talked about why I run so this gives me the perfect opportunity to tell the world.  In 2013, I’ve run five half marathons, two 10Ks, one 10 milers, one 5K and logged many miles on the road in my free time.  This year I became a runner! I run for many reasons.  I run because I never thought I would be able to because of my weight.  I never thought I would shed the weight and be able to…

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Running: Rock n Roll San Diego

Running: Rock n Roll San Diego

We went to San Diego to run! My first Rock n Roll race was the Dallas race and I loved the experience so much I had to go again. I had no idea that San Diego would have so many people racing. There were a lot of people. Plus, Willie decided RnR San Diego was going to be his first half marathon! This made me so very happy, but I’ll talk more about that later. On Friday we went to the expo to register Willie and to pick up all of our stuff. This expo was really nice and we…

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The toughest race I’ve ever ran

The toughest race I’ve ever ran

On Memorial Day, Willie and I ran the The Patriot Half Marathon (me) and 5k (him) to support Carry The Load.  We started out being very excited about this race but it kind of got over shadowed by the race we will run in San Diego on Sunday!  But this was the hardest race I’ve ever ran.  There was humidity and wind and hills. I’m just not use to the rolling hills so I had to take it slow.  Plus, I wasn’t interested in injuring myself where I couldn’t run in SAN DIEGO!  You see?  It’s become that important to…

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Fear caused a momentary lapse

Fear caused a momentary lapse

Fear is a crazy thing.  It will make me second guess my choices, it will make me afraid to take a risk, it will hold me back in life. Fear always creeps up when I’m feeling the strongest to cast a shadow of doubt over my life.  I’ve been trying to figure out why I’ve been going through such a roller coaster lately with pretty much everything and it all comes down to fear!  Fear is a bad thing.  I remember being little and not being afraid of anything.  I went through life being my bravest self; becoming an adult…

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The Catch Up Post: Goals, Races and Mother’…

The Catch Up Post: Goals, Races and Mother’s Day

I feel out of touch with the blog because so many things have been going on in life. As you may have read, my grandmother passed and I took it very hard. I didn’t expect to take it that hard, but I did. There were a lot of tears shed over this experience. I saw her decline every day until she passed; I basically watched her die. She’s in a better place now after living a long and amazing life. Her passing added emotional stress and sleep deprivation to my life so my overall well being kind of took a…

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Donate To St. Jude Children’s Hospital To …

Donate To St. Jude Children’s Hospital To Make A Difference

We need your help! Cancer is something that has touched both of our lives this past year when my mom was diagnosed. We have seen the monetary cost of cancer and that is why we are choosing to run for a reason. On December 7, 2013, I will run my first marathon (26.2 miles) and Willie will run the half marathon (13.1 miles) but we want to be St. Jude heroes. To do that, we both must raise $500 EACH! We have changed others lives by sharing our story and this is how we want to change someone else’s life.…

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Willie’s first long distance race: Austin 10/20

Willie’s first long distance race: Austin 10/20

I ran my first 10 mile race on April 14th! This was my first long distance run. Before this race I had only run 5K races with a finishing time around 36 or 37 minutes. A couple of days before the race, Angela bought me a new pair of running shoes, running socks, and calf compression sleeves. When I ran the previous 5Ks, I had been running in a pair of old Nike running shoes that really needed to be thrown in the trash. The new shoes were Brooks running shoes and when I first put them on I noticed…

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Let’s kick tragedy in the face

Let’s kick tragedy in the face

We are runners!  I am proud to say this and I’m even more proud that I can say WE are runners!  The blog has been left silent for a couple of days because we have been busy doing some amazing things.  Now is not the time to talk about those things, because of the horrible things that happened in Boston yesterday.  It breaks our hearts to know people were out there doing something they trained and worked so hard for and someone took their lives…and their family’s lives. It’s hard to grasp! The running community is strong and we all…

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2:13:50 – My first Rock N Roll race

2:13:50 – My first Rock N Roll race

My Rock n Roll Dallas experience was amazing.  I was really hesitant about running this race because the Gusher was just two weeks before.  I had never run two half marathons that close to each other and I was just afraid to commit, but I’m glad that I did. After the Gusher, my knee was bothering me and I got worried about not being able to run in Dallas.  I did small short runs, became really great friends with my foam roller and did lots and lots of stretching.  I even cut back on teaching my spin classes (I like…

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Reflections on The Gusher 2013

Reflections on The Gusher 2013

Sadly, the Gusher is over, but there are plenty of memories to last me a lifetime.  Running in that race was one of the best days of my life.  There were a lot of people to meet and there were a lot of inspiring stories to be heard. Days like this are a reminder of why we make southeast Texas our home. Last year, I was scared and lone, but this year was a different story.  What a difference a year makes! Besides blisters on my feet and some windy weather, I have no complaints about the day and will…

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