Putting yourself first

Life is busy and things get really messed up in life, but it is OK to put yourself first. Have you ever made a list of the important things in your life? Where do you fall on that list? Most of the time your name doesn’t even show up on the list.

I’m giving you permission to put yourself on the list.

The misconception about putting yourself first is that selfishness. This is not being selfish, this is smart. Think about all the things you do in a day and how many of those things you do for other people. Women are put in these places of being a good spouse, mother, daughter, friend, etc. It is hard not to chip away at yourself and sometimes build resentment towards life.

If you don’t put yourself first, there is no way you can do anything for others for that reason: resentment.

There are times when I just get frustrated in life and I just have to look at how I’m using my time. I feel like I’m doing too much and then I feel bad because the first things I do in the morning are things for myself. I sometimes think I should take those times to be working on other things and occasionally I do. For the most part, the early morning hours are for me. Yes, I know I could fold the laundry, or clean up around the house, or just get ready for the day ahead, or work on the grocery list, etc. The list could go on.

It is important that I have time in my day, my week, my month that are things I’m doing for myself because I know when I put myself first, I can better help and serve the other areas of my life. There are times when I do feel like I’m selfish, but in the end, I know it’s the right thing to do.

One cannot pour from an empty cup, so it is important to refill that cup early and often before reaching a breaking point.

Take control of your well-being.

The one thing we can control in life is ourselves. I control what I think, how I feel, the things I do, the food I eat. I have a responsibility to take care of myself!

Take the time you need without feeling selfish. Take the time to put yourself first because you are the only person who truly knows what you want and need.  Your place on your list is the most important part because you do carry a heavy load in life.

I’m responsible for a lot of things throughout the day and list is long some days.  I can’t keep pushing myself to the bottom of the list in favor of doing something else or always helping someone else out.

How can I put myself first?

  1. Find out what your priorities are in life.  Really take the time to find out the things that are important in YOUR life.  What do you want to accomplish?  What are your dreams?  When you put this in perspective you can then begin to map out your path.  There’s no need to NOT chase your goals and dreams because you’re too busy doing something else, probably for someone else.  This could be the smallest thing like saying you want to keep a more organized closet to wanted to be more present with your children or starting your own business.
  2. Give yourself 30 minutes a day.  Wake up earlier, stay up later, cut the TV off for 30 minutes and just take the time to do something for yourself.  You can choose to workout, read or write a book, meditate, or listen to music.  I’m just asking you to take 30 minutes a day to work on yourself.
  3. Tell yourself the truth. There are people in your life that will co-sign everything you think and say, don’t be that person to yourself.  Be the person in your life that can count on, to tell the truth.  This is just a way to rebuild the relationship you have with yourself so that you can tackle all situations.  This doesn’t mean you need to criticize yourself or stand in your own way.  This means finding out why you think and feel the way you do about certain things.  This is being honest about the things that truly make you happy and the things that make you unhappy.  There’s no sugar coating here.  This is doing something for yourself that need to do.

Take the time to put yourself on the list and really think about the things you want out of your life.  It’s not being selfish, it’s being proactive.  Life is filled with things that we NEED to do, but taking care of yourself is a NEED.  Don’t leave yourself off the list.  What you want, think and feel are just as important as any other need.