I’m not being the best version of myself.
I’m not being the best version of myself, and it shows. I haven’t posted a “real” blog post on here in almost a year, but this place has been constantly on my mind. This blog also served as a platform to hold me accountable. Things have changed a lot in my life, and taking care of myself has been on the back burner.
Because of these changes, I haven’t been able to work out consistently.
I’ve gained weight and lost a lot of sleep. I’m stressed most of the time.
Right now, I’m eating to survive, not to nourish my body, and that’s another sign of my current struggles.
My blog has been a place for me to share my running experiences through the years. Sadly, I haven’t run in a year. I’ve attempted to restart, but I always fall back. This is a part of myself that I miss.
I have now become a caregiver to my aging mother, which has thrown my family’s life into a tailspin. We’ve changed environments and routines. Plus, there are medical emergencies and all the little things you don’t expect along the way. Life looks different. Somewhere along this change, I started to leave myself behind.
Even so, without my husband and daughter, things would have been much worse. They have truly taken care of me and stood next to me on this journey—even though they never asked for it.
I am ready to recapture that part of my life and move forward with hope.
I don’t want to call this a new beginning because I’ll never be able to go back to where I was two years ago. This is my next chapter, where I start to take care of myself again. I want to be the woman who gets things done so that I can enjoy the slower, cozy life at home. I want to be a productive woman during the day, and a strong hobby enthusiast at night. I want to do the things I have to do, so I can come home to enjoy the things I want to do.
What am I hoping to do in my next chapter?
I want to be more consistent with my content. This means setting reasonable expectations for how many videos I can put out each month and how many blog posts I can write. BUT this also means I need to be better about planning out content, so I’m not constantly searching for ideas or getting blocked. Time is a valuable resource, so I need to use my time wisely.
There will be a content switch. In life, I’m highly productive, so I need to talk about what I know. But at the same time, I take myself too seriously. I’ve already said it before: I want to get the stuff done so I can come home and do the things I want to do. I want to focus on enjoying the little things in life, including embracing hobbies and incorporating them into everyday routines to ease life’s stress. I’m not entirely sure this makes sense, but I want to build a community of people who embrace a well-balanced life.
I want to spend time doing something I love to fill my cup. Overall, I need a better outlook on life, and that starts with investing in myself. Creating content has always been a part of me. I created content long before it was “cool” to create content, but I’ve always done it for myself. I would like to get back to that point.
Here’s my latest YouTube video to help you better understand the situation, and there’s a lot more to come.
Life isn’t always easy, fair, or fun, but we only get one life, and I no longer want to waste time worrying, complaining, or being stressed out. This is a turning point for me, and I need you, a blog reader, to keep me accountable along the way.
